I’ve been married for 12 years this year and it has been fun along the entire journey. Whilst it is true there have been times when I could have reached for the hatchett, it is also true that I have grown immensely as a person with the love and support of my husband constantly at my side and no one else will do!
Marriage is surely not easy, you really do have to work at it and sometimes that actually can be easier to do in the hard times than it can be in the good times. When it’s tough you hold on to each other for comfort with your common ground being the testing circumstances that are going through. Whilst I am aware that some couples just fall apart at this stage, to be honest, in my experience many more fall during what I call the Canaan experience. You know, you’ve been through a tough time and come out the other side and now things are hunky dorey. However, now that you no longer have this common ground and things are going well and you don’t have to cling to each other so tight, your grip loosens and starts to fall away.
This is what I see as a real issue in many marriages, how to hold on in the good times when the water is smooth and there are no rough seas to battle together. The smooth seas require you to invest more heavily in your relationship, working to build even more common ground with your spouse, working together to make each day count.
Marriage for me is one of the most beautiful relationships in life… if you are willing to work at it. It’s not something to give up on at the first hurdle or to get bored of when things are going smoothly. It’s for keeps and if you start of with that in mind and work at not only your marraige but at your own personal growth then your good thing will keep on going.
For those of you who are not married, don’t rush into it, take your time. Like a fine mature wine it takes time to be magnificent! Marriage…mmm